Chin: Hey, the MPs are asking for info, even the PAP MPs!
Chai: Aiyah, wayang to show they as garang as the Opp MPs lah.
Chin: But a few like Patrick Tay and Foo Mee Hay have been saying the same things over the years…what if not wayang?
Chai: Then the whip will keep them in line. Don’t worry.
Chin: So we don’t give info?
Chai: Of course we do! Info that is in our favour. Give rates of increase, proportions, linear progressions and all the mumbo jumbo data to make them think they see the whole elephant, and not just the parts.
Chin: Good idea! I suppose we should recommend phrases like empathy, sympathy, open-mindedness, inclusiveness, embracing?
Chai: Yes, just don’t say we were wrong. And don’t forget to evoke emotion….like we’re walking with you, even if you use crutches or in a wheelchair.
Chin: But if the MPs persist in asking for more info?
Chai: Tell them to file a proper parliamentary question. They think we so free ah, have info on hand? Gotta dig.
Chin: And tell them in the reply that we don’t have or don’t disclose such info?
Chai: Absolutely! You’re learning, my boy!
An ex-journalist who can't get enough of the news after being in the business for 26 years
