A possible WP response to SDP

The Workers’ Party has been pretty disciplined in its responses to questions on the by-election, particularly to SDP’s overtures. I can bet my bottom dollar that there’s plenty of internal discussion.
Anyway, here’s a totally fictitious response from WP to SDP. My apologies to Mr Low Thia Kiang.

Dear Dr Chee,

I see you have been very busy. You must be tired. Walking around Punggol East. Talking to media. Writing emails. I leave all my writing to Sylvia. Her English better than mine. But I thought I should say something now because you have said so many things.

You know those emails to my party? You know you put me in a difficult position? I told Sylvia to reply to you politely. Don’t get angry but we are not sure we want to join you. And now we definitely don’t want to join you.
First of all, the SDP seems to have so many problems, so much history, so many lawsuits before. It’s like a target for the PAP.

If I join you, I kena become target as well.
Second thing, you seem so atas. All those policy papers. Very complicated. But very good. Very good. The Opposition must show that we have brains.

Actually, I wonder why SDP is interested in Punggol East, I didn’t see you there in the last election. I sent a nice woman there, and she took so many votes. So actually, Punggol East already belongs to WP or maybe the SDA. Some more, it’s in the east, quite near Hougang and Aljunied. I can argue that WP will have more economies of scale if we run the town council.
Anyway, why did you have to show the media those emails? You want to show you are trying to be considerate and avoid a three-corner fight? You know right…when you do this sort of thing, the people will think that we are quarrelling… No opposition unity. How to fight the PAP?

(You don’t have my handphone number? You want everything in black and white?)

And then, I saw you gave a press conference and I simply cannot tahan. How can? If the opposition wins, your people go to Parliament and my people run the town council? I know we have more experience running a town council, but we also have more experience in Parliament. All the opposition MPs belong to my party. Or maybe you think we don’t have housing or healthcare policy to share? Wait lah.

You know, some people say WP should not be selfish. Opposition got chance now so let another opposition party win. You think SDP got chance or WP got more chance? Your Vincent Wijeysingha and Paul Thambyah or my Gerald Giam and Yee Jenn Jong?
I read in the papers today that you say you have been misinterpreted – so you can run town council, and my people sit in Parliament. But where got such thing as splitting an MP? What unity candidate? Crazy.
I think the PAP is probably laughing right now. Even if we campaign together, it will still be a multi-corner fight. All those old-timer independents popping up…

I told Gerald to send out a press release. Not to say anything much. Just that we will offer Punggol East someone to vote for. Who? I haven’t decided. Even I have decided, I am not going to tell you.
All I want to say is, better to concentrate on the PAP. That doctor looks not bad. Can speak dialect and all. Some more heartlander, son of bus driver. But if he is the son of Punggol, I am the grandfather of Hougang.

Huat ah!

Sincerely,
Low Thia Kiang
Secretary-General
Workers’ Party.

This is a private and confidential email. Not meant to be released to the media.