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A possible SDP reply to WP

Following the earlier post from Mr Low to Dr Chee. Here is Dr Chee’s reply. Totally fictitious. Apologies to both men.

Dear Mr Low,
Thank you for your letter explaining why you rebuffed our perfectly sensible idea to put forth a unity candidate. I concede defeat and as, you may have read, I have decided that the SDP should pull out of the by-election. (I warn you though that I still have a couple of hours to change my mind.)

Nevertheless, I have decided to heed the growing calls for SDP to pull out of the by-election. I am doing so in the interest of opposition unity. You have forced my hand, and by your silence, you’ve succeeded in making me a pariah of the opposition. Even the netizens whom I believe are my most fervent supporters have turned against me.
I am getting some plaudits now for the withdrawal. Yet there are others who complaining about my lack of determination (I have plenty! ) and botched strategy (which I maintain is correct). My past words are being misinterpreted (again!) and my past moves are being misconstrued (again!). I am Singapore’s most misunderstood politician. Nevertheless I will survive. I will prevail. I am a son of Singapore!

I am now toting up the cost of the preparations for this election. As you can see, I prepared two sets of posters – for both Vincent and Paul. Naturally, they are upset. As are my party members. I would have to do my utmost now to keep them in line, and to stay within the fold till the next GE. As usual, I would have to deploy my usual charisma and charm. They will understand that the SDP has a noble cause, even if the leadership, namely me, is fallible (which I’m not).
By the way, if I was eligible to stand, I am almost certain that the people will be on my side. Chee Soon Juan versus your Lee Li Lian? That’s hardly a contest (pardon my ego). I would have gone to the Nomination Centre, guns blazing. The PAP would have been cowed by my presence. Of course, it will also be looking closely to see if I broke any law in the hope of having me disqualified. You know I started distributing my fliers after the writ of election was called… Some people say I was flouting the campaigning rules. Well, even if I have done so, there is no reason to persecute/prosecute me now since the SDP is out of the fray. From now I intend to keep my nose clean for the next electoral fight. Perhaps, between now and then, we can sit down for a cup of coffee. By the way, you still haven’t given me your handphone number.

My only consolation today is that I made it to the front page of The Straits Times. Not a flattering picture. As usual photographers never manage to capture my good side.

Now that SDP is out of the fray, we are in the midst of intense discussions about whether we should help you with your campaign. Or help SDA’s Desmond Lim. Or Reform Party’s Kenneth Jeyaretnam. I envisage being a king-maker, or power broker of sorts. Time for the rest of you to court me. I have the resources, the manpower. I am also an orator. Would you like me to speak at your rally?

It remains for me now to do the polite thing and wish you and your party the best in this by-election.
Chee Soon Juan
Singapore Democratic Party

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An ex-journalist who can't get enough of the news after being in the business for 26 years

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